7.5.2009, set the date.
I still very much ignorant to this matter, as long as both of you are happy. God, please bless them with happiness.
I never thought it will happen. I never think it will. Why the fuck all changed in the short two fucking years? It's too drastic. I don't see it coming, or maybe i am. But what the hell? What are the fucking things triggered it? This is just so fugly. I don't know how should i do. what should i say to make things better? All of us who are involved feel the pain, though most of the time we chose to ignore. But no matter how ignorant we are, it's still there. It's still there in mind, it haunts. The sms-es you sent us today, it hurts. But i switched it to silence. I, too feel the sadness. I covered myself in blanket and slept. But when i woke up, i wanted to call my sisters and ask for the updates. But there is something holding me back. My fear, i am too chicken to know, and now leaving me with my imagination. What the future lies is still very blur. the road is still long and i pray there's no obstacles or challenges along the way. What can make us, together again? they say, everything happens for a reason, BUT i don't see it here. We are all very independent, this couldn't make us any better. Why? Just fucking tell me why. Hah, there's nothing we can do. Fuck fuck fuck. Hey up there, please tell us the reason you separate us apart. WHATS IN YOUR MIND AND PLEASE TELL ME YOUR MOTIVE.
D, the truth is we should hate you for all you have done. BUT why do we still have to treat you nicely? I don't understand. I am freaking don't udnerstand. So what if you're our d. Why we need to be your side? WE ALL FUCKING KNOW it's your fault. YOU FUCKING SELFISH. I HATE YOU. Please stop do any mentally torture on anyone of us anymore. We are done with it. I AM at least. I don't undestand where are all my guts? Why the fuck am i still treating you like you're the king of the house? FUCK, i hate myself for my cowardness. I typed the message and just dun have the gut to push the send button. I am leaving this behind. Once i am done with uni i gotta go far away and leave this behind. seriously. Fuck that.
M,i'm sorry for all the things you have gone through and all the tears you cried. You have shown us the best example and you showered us with love. it's really shitty that you should be the one in the house not d. Fuck. Why? ARGH.
FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCK you. Fuck off. damn.